I don't think Harry is a shallow person, the lyrics have a lot of anger and passion in them and I'm not buying the narrative that this is simply about a one night stand, a femme fatale, prostitution. etc. His songs have multiple points of views (he's not always writing in his own perspective), and he's said that the album is about one person. He's also said that Kiwi is a favorite of his. Therefore this isn't just a random fun song. I'm almost certain Kiwi satirizes Babygate.

"When she's alone she goes home to a cactus, in a black dress she's such an actress" sounds like it's about Briana. Actually, every verse is about lies, pretense, fakeness. "She worked her way through a cheap pack of cigarettes, Hard liquor mixed with a bit of intellect" is about putting up a facade. The emphasis on "It's like I paid for it, it's like I paid for it, I'm gonna pay for this" alludes to how Louis was punished with Babygate, and the day Simon flew him to LA to have a "private discussion" (presumably about being less flamboyant)

Then, there's two things in the music video that may be coincidences but I find it funny. The woman is smoking and drinking and saying she's having a baby...and there was a picture of Briana drinking while she was supposedly "pregnant", which is used as evidence that Briana was never pregnant and all of this is BS. Second of all, the kids are all throwing cake at each other....sounds familiar? When One Direction performed at a gay bar, all of them happy, Louis and Harry closer than ever, and Louis had cake all over him. This day is known as the last day of Louis' freedom. Also worth mentioning is that Harry tweeted "Cake gate." in 2015.

And to wrap all of this up; everyone is talking about this song being related to New Zealand because of the title. And you know who's a New Zealander? Dan Wooton...I'm not going to get into how he's a shitty person but just know that he plays a big role in Louis' closeting.